Friday, December 31, 2010

God's in Everyone's Business

This is a copy of the email update that I sent to friends on December 27th, 2010              
I wanted to share with you what happened earlier today.  Since the Dept. of Homeland Security/USCIS has begun processing my adoption paperwork, I received notice of the fingerprinting appointment scheduled for this afternoon.  Since I share a home with my mother, we had already been electronically fingerprinted a few months back for our state criminal clearance. - Homeland Security requires this to be done for federal records, as well.  Though the appointment notice stated that the office would require only one form of identification, my adoption agency had warned me that their clients had experienced problems with Homeland Security in the past.  So my mother and I arrived there armed with passports, social security cards, a copy of my home study, and my four-inch binder filled with the adoption paperwork (neatly organized with color-coded tabs and labels)--- just in case.                                                                                                                                                             You know how the Holy Spirit gives you those gut feelings as a heads-up or warning?  Well, I felt that when I entered the office and stood in front of the entrance agent’s desk, and he directed me to move to the roped-off line right beside his desk--- even though there was no one else waiting!  Okay, so I was dealing with a man who took his government job WAAAY too seriously, but I would play along.  Of course, immediately after I got in line, he ordered me over to his desk.  (Whatever.  I’ll deal with this.)  I gave him my appointment notice, and my mother and I handed over our drivers licenses.  That’s when the trouble began.  Apparently, I had been scheduled for fingerprinting, and my mother had not.  So I pulled out another letter from my binder- a receipt from Homeland Security indicating that I had already paid the fees for the two of us when I sent them my paperwork back in November.  The agent put his hand up in front of my face (big mistake) and told me that he was going back to speak with a supervisor.  I was not about to be dismissed, and asked him to take the receipt to show his supervisor.  He declined, and told me to take a seat.  He eventually returned to his desk and called me over to fill out some paperwork, giving me no information as to what had transpired with his supervisor.- So would my mother need to fill out paperwork, too? I asked.  He replied that they had no record of her appointment in their system, and told me to sit back down.  Cell phones are not permitted in their office, and I was dying to call my adoption agency in Austin for help, when the head immigration officer approached me and began explaining that my mother’s appointment was not on file.  He was callous when he said that there was nothing they could do about it, and told me that I would have to email the government about it.  I was being dismissed, and I absolutely lost it.  Last year when my heart stopped during surgery, Jesus showed me my daughter.  I know what she looks like, and right there in that office, all I saw was a man standing between me and my baby.  He had pushed, and I pushed right back, pulling out the receipt and the emails from the adoption agency indicating the required fees and order for two fingerprintings.  I also let him know that I was a teacher and had already paid Homeland Security a huge sum.  He then put his hand on my shoulder in an attempt to quiet me.  (Big mistake.  Had he never seen Animal Planet?  You don’t touch an angry mama bear!)  Again, he told me that there was nothing he could do, and left.  At this point, I was shaking with anger and could not think straight.  My mother had been sitting there during the exchange with an unreadable expression on her face (she was actually praying), and I sank down in the chair beside her and asked if I had gotten too angry with the agent.  I was now acutely aware of all the cameras and mirrors around me and now feared that I had just blown things with the US government.  Without hesitation, my mother began praying out loud for Jesus to work things out and for him to change the agent’s hardened heart.  Within a minute after saying “Amen,” the immigration agent approached us and said that he would fax our information directly to Homeland Security, and made copies of the appointment notice and my mother’s driver’s license and passport.  He did a complete turnaround and became courteous and helpful!  I was stunned at how quickly God had changed his heart.  I was called back to have my prints taken, and then to the agent’s office.  Inside, he told me that he had faxed over the copies of the paperwork and asked me for my email address so that he could courtesy copy the letter that he had just written to the main office.  He explained that the federal office had obviously made an error, since the receipt indicated that I had paid for two.  He told me that as soon as the main office responded, that I could print out their email response and bring my mother back any time. – I would not need to schedule an appointment, or wait for a formal notice in the mail.  I thanked him, and when my mother and I got in the car, we sat there and praised God for intervening.  I’d like to know what Jesus said to that agent that changed his hard-heartedness!  I thank God for being a God that intervenes anywhere, at any moment.

Journey to Adoption- How God Finally Got My Attention

            Those of you who know me know my story.  For the rest of you reading this, this is the story of how God finally got my attention.
             Ever since visiting an orphanage on a mission trip years ago, I had felt the pull to one day adopt a child of my own.  I kept putting it off, though.  I would adopt when I had a spouse, a better job...  On February 3rd, 2009 Jesus made his message loud and clear when my heart stopped during "routine" surgery---
              When I awoke from surgery in a haze, the first thing I remember seeing was my daughter's face.  I could feel her on my left side as I held her to my heart, an actual physical sensation.  So many things were blurry after surgery, and my doctors and mother later told me things that I said in recovery that I do not remember.  Yet one thing stands out vividly: that I saw my daughter's face; I'll know it when I see it again.  The feeling that came with it was the strongest assurance that I was alive to fulfill God's purpose for my life.  This message was as clear as day to me.  During recovery, I shared this information with my doctors, nurses and my mother; telling them all of this before I would even open my eyes.  According to my mother and doctor, I announced that Jesus was in the recovery room.  When a Jewish nurse dismissed my statement, I became louder and argued "No, you don't get it.  Jesus is right here with us."  As I said this, everyone observed changes on the heart monitor that I was hooked up to due to a now-irregular heartbeat.  I do not remember saying any of this.  All I remember is seeing my daughter and knowing that I was alive to fulfill my life's purpose- to adopt, and not put it off any longer.  (As the nurse was leaving her shift a few hours later, she approached my mother and told her that she'd never seen a patient speak as I had, and that it made her do some thinking.)
                It felt like a tremendous feat when I finally opened my eyes.  I remember my doctors' faces hovering so close to mine and them telling me that my heart had stopped during surgery.  Since I felt warm and free of pain, I asked my anesthesiologist if I was still alive.  When he told me yes, I remember saying "good job!"  He then got closer and asked me if I remembered anything, which seemed like an odd question at the time, since I was under during surgery.  I soon came to realize that he was meaning to ask me if I'd recalled dying in the operating room.
               I don't know why I can't remember Jesus' face, or the things I said before I opened my eyes.  Maybe we are not allowed or even able to look upon the face of God until our time is come.  God is so much greater that He comes to people in forms that are comprehensible: a burning bush, a pillar of fire, a declaration from an angel.  If you stood at the base of Mount Everest with your nose to the rock, your field of vision is so small and so limited that all you see is rock.  Standing back from heaven's perspective, you can take in its sheer size.  I think that I cannot remember Jesus' face because I am meant to be alive.  He came to deliver His message and to show me my daughter.  Only then was I finally able to open my eyes.